Similar Image Search (php)

This is more or less a tutorial of how to compare images as strings and find the most similar image using php similar_text();

Here is my whole tiny source with the explanation in the comments.
function image_square($url){
//get a string of any image
$ch curl_init();
$image_soure curl_exec($ch);
//basic booleans to tell image type
if(preg_match("/png/i"$image_soure$m)) {
$image imagecreatefrompng($url);
$image imagecreatefromgif($url);
$image imagecreatefromjpeg($url);
//create 16*16 image and mash together
$width imagesx($image);
$height imagesy($image);
$image_p imagecreatetruecolor(1616);
//save output to return, then delete output
$m md5(rand(-999,999));
$output file_get_contents("temp$m.png");
$a image_square('http://localhost:8888/image1.jpg');
$b image_square('http://localhost:8888/image2.jpg');
$c image_square('http://localhost:8888/image3.jpg');
//compare the PNG binary strings
$sim1 similar_text($a$b);
$sim2 similar_text($a$c);
"a similarity to b: ".$sim1."\n<br>".
"a similarity to c: ".$sim2);
// returns
// a similarity to b: 60
// a similarity to c: 78

$$ Legal To Graphics! YAY! $$

I saved up some SSD because I just did some *cough* months in Faith Regional BHU and PPU (1 shared shower), so I didn’t have to buy groceries… It’s illegal for me to save my SSD, because of Social Security Bum’s Law (must be in poverty; disabled people deserve to be bums until you understand philosophically the reason we work and the meaning of life that!), so I bought some legit graphic design software straight from _ I’ve been meaning to do this ever since 3 years of college pimped me out to Adobe and now I have a crutch to only use Adobe, and nothing a penny cheaper…

No more designing graphics on torrents Photoshop! Torrents gun down planes (turrets?) I mean torrents sink ships (dictionary…). It’s a metaphor about all the viruses, me thinks. Don’t judge! For the longest time, group homes made me live on $50 a month. I however, am neither promoting nor admitting to piracy. These two pieces of plastic could have bought me a used car.

Coherency warning ^. I’m on a heavy antipsychotic shot. Invega Trinza…

Check Your Privilege

This is a scorekeeper for that dumb Check Your Privilege meme.

Jake Jilg and his iMac [LOVE!]

If you don’t react this way to a brand new computer, you don’t love her.
A love that transcends all:
Jake Jilg and his iMac.

We’re dating. This is real! We’ve been a couple for a long time…

  • As I grew from a boy, into a man, into a user.
  • She grew from the school Apple 2e, into a PPC G4, into an Intel Core i7.

And we will always be together.

P.S. We came up with this story, before that Her movie.

P.P.S. After the camera cut out, I hooked her up, keyboard and mouse and customized the OS and stuff. What do you think we did?

Calvin Pees On – Image

So here is a thing. This meme is from the 1990’s.
Copy this image URL and change the png filename to “anything” and it will put “anything” into Calvin’s pee.

Edit the filename in the input area.

// will become =>

or in black and white

// will become =>

or in invert.

// will become =>


This is my oldest game still existing. I made it in Klik&Play in 2001. Many computer crashes ago, and corrupted floppies, lightning surge fried HDs, since before we got a cd burner, all killed 90% of my completed games and my game making passion. Or else my passion died when I started underage drinking. I don’t own the Nintendo midis. I was 16 and this was in 2001 times.

This is the only one that survived worth keeping and I found it on the Wayback Engine of my old Xoom website.

Download .zip Windows – This has been on the Wayback engine since 2001 and I don’t know how they acquired it. I didn’t scan it for viruses; I’m on a Mac. I recommend just watching the video. It’s short.

The music was blantantly taken from good old gen-1 hosted NES midi personal homepages from back in the day.

Google helped me discover it’s actually from Solstice. I wasn’t familiar with this game.